Saturday, 14 August 2010

What's bugging me?

Some of my regular readers may have surmised that something is amiss. Well my brain has been working overtime for the past week with the usual consequences...difficulty sleeping...the need to walk and ponder.

Some of you will recall me mentioning a little while ago that PJB (Brother No.2) was seriously unwell and ended up in hospital. Well only a week ago (just 2 weeks after being released) he collapsed at his home and was again rushed to hospital but this time it was far more serious. Within 24 hours he suffered a heart attack (a chest infection on top of his self induced kidney problems certainly didn't help) and after a very lengthy resuscitation  procedure he was immediately transferred to the Intensive Care Unit where he has lain 'asleep' for the last 7 days plugged into every conceivable piece of electronic equipment and is on dialysis.
A Hornet hanging on!

So for days I have been out walking, pondering and trying to order my thoughts.......
What will happen, what will he be, when and if he finally awakens from his deep sleep.
Other thoughts are also for his only son and my aging parents who are trying desperately to stay positive but fear for his future and that he may just return to his old destructive habits. 

I visited this evening together with my mother and his ex-wife who is being extremely supportive. It is the most peaceful I have ever seen him look....tucked up like a baby...very occasionally twitching his closed eyes as we spoke quietly to him... words of encouragement and advice... could he really hear us... I sincerely hope so. He has the permanent company of very experienced medical staff as they now wait patiently to monitor his eventual reaction to the reduction of the drugs..... and we all wait to learn of his prognosis.... whatever that is. 
Sleep peacefully PJB and hopefully awaken to see the beauty of all around you.....FAB.    


  1. What a sad and eloquent post! I'm so sorry to hear about your brother. I wish him and you, and all those who care for him, the best.

  2. We are all waiting with you - you are not alone. ~karen

  3. Frank..I do hope that your being able to share this with your blogger friends has helped you!!
    I hope you don't mind but I would like to pray for you and your family for this situtation!!!
    Thoughts will be with you!!

  4. Very well said and described for an extremely difficult situtation. I hope that your brother will recover and regain his health. It does make one sit up and ponder. It's a situation with much turmoil. My thoughts are with you.

  5. Certainly a lot to think about and keep you awake at night. You have lots of folks out here in the blogosphere projecting good wishes toward you, your brother, and family.
    take care,

  6. Oh my dear Frank. It is so sad to read of this and it must be heartbreaking for you and the family. All I can say is to stay strong and you are in my thoughts during this awful time. Hugs.

  7. I'm very sorry to hear that your brother is poorly, you have my consolations.

  8. Frank, you and your family must be going through hell at the moment.
    I sincerely hope your brother improves, and is soon on the road to recovery.
    Best wishes my friend.

  9. Frank, thank you for sharing, a tormenting time for you all!
    Really hope your brother improves soon, My thoughts are with you & your family, take care!

  10. I wish all will be well again and you will all be happy as ever!

  11. Hi Frank.....a tough situation.
    My heart goes out to your parents, I shall keep them in my thoughts and hope they find a way to deal with this situation.

    To me, you always appear to find a route. Whether it be a walk through the woods or through the depths of your mind.
    I do hope that your brother finds peace in this life or indeed the next.

    My thoughts are with you......

    BTW I feel in my heart your brother would have heard you.

  12. Dearest Frank, I knew something was amiss but am very glad to know that you are able to share this experience (hoping this will help you to put order to it) and find some peace. I have several family members who have illnesses that keep me busy pondering life itself. I am fortunate to be one of the more healthy ones of my siblings.

    My hope for you is to find order, peace and hopefulness that your brother will come out of this "sleep" and awaken to recuperate and become active again. It is hard leaving it up to God to work these things through for others as we sit on the sidelines. My prayers and thoughts are with you. Carol

  13. I'm so sorry to hear about your brother Frank. You are in my thoughts. Take care! Jen x

  14. Frank...I'm so sorry your brother is so ill and you are in turmoil. Thank goodness he has devoted family around to help him. I wish you all peace...

  15. Here's hoping that things soon resolve satisfactorily Frank. It is indeed very difficult to stop the brain churning things over.

  16. Hi Everyone. I'm sure you'll excuse me from not responding individually to each and every kind message that you have left.

    I sincerely thank you all for your supportive thoughts and good wishes. No update news today so presume no change for the worse.

    Bless you all. FAB.

  17. Late in catching up on blog reading, Frank, but so very sorry to catch up on your news. Please add my hopes, prayers and good thoughts to all those expressed above not only for your brother's recovery, but for peace for you and your family.

  18. Hi Beatrice. Thoughts and prayers warmly accepted.

  19. Frank, I am just catching up and I am so sorry to read about your brother. As you are aware, I know what it feels like to have a family member desperately ill, and knowing what a terrible burden it must be for your parents. I hope he recovers. My thoughts are with you.

  20. Frank, I am sending you a big supportive hug through cyberspace. I am so sad to learn of this news, but am glad to hear that family is there to support each other. You all are in my thoughts and blessings. Take good care.

  21. ((Frank)) I'm so sorry to hear you and your family are having a tough time. I hope things improve very soon.

    There's nothing quite like spending time in the company of nature to comfort and heal us :).

  22. Just to let you know I got your message, but AOL is having a hissy fit and won't let me send any emails.

  23. Thanks Gaina. Hope it sorts itself out soon, but don't fret about sending a reply. FAB.


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